Went to my brand new Laryngologist in Charlottesville, N. Carolina, on Thursday and got my first set of Botox injections in almost a year (believe me, it's not that I don't need 'em anymore. We lost our insurance when we left NTBI, and now have a new policy with a $6,000 deductible. We simply can't afford to keep getting 'em every 3 months as the condition really requires).
Got some unsavory new revelation from Doc Daniero (a young guy I am truly impressed with!).
You see, there are actually TWO forms of the voice disorder I suffer from (spasmodic dysphonia). One is called "adductor," which means the vocal cords stick in the "open" position on certain sounds (usually particular consonants). The other is AB-ductor, where they stick "closed."
My previous doc had it down that I have "a classic case" of AD-ductor, which is actually the "better" of the two, because it responds better to the Botox injections.
There is a Spasmodic Dysphonia Facebook page that I check in on. It's a "closed group," but if you, the non-s.d. sufferer, could scope out that site for yourself, you would see the devastation this voice disorder wreaks in so many lives. It's quite amazing how having a "broken voice" reduces so many folks to abject despair. It radically affects their social lives, their career pursuits and their self-images in ways you probably would never imagine unless you were in their shoes.
And, tragically, the vast majority of them do not know the Lord Jesus as their Savior and Shepherd, which makes all the difference in the world.
You would also see that the folks who have s.d. are always stating which variety they have -- whether AD-ductor, or AB-ductor. I have only ever seen one or two who said they've got BOTH.
Well, the new doc determined beyond a doubt that, sadly, I HAVE BOTH.
They are still calling s.d. "a rare disorder" in all the articles and posts.
I guess this new diagnosis puts me in the rare AMONG the rare!
Ahh . . . Woe is me, woe is me, right!? Alas, alack, all is kaput! Right??
God's got this. So, LITERALLY, "it's all good" (Romans 8:28-39).
My deaf friend, Richard, tells me his late, lovely wife, Tiffany, who was also deaf, refused to allow well-meaning friends to pray over her ears for "healing" (Tiffany went to be with Jesus this past April, leaving Richard to raise four minor children all by his lonesome).
"God made me deaf for a purpose," Tiff would tell them.
[Note: it should be understood that Tiffany had an amazing fellowship and ministry among her deaf sisters and brothers that may well have been diminished by her gaining her hearing and giving up an intrinsic component of that common bond. Though it may be hard for hearing people to understand, many, many deaf individuals do not feel they need to be "fixed." There is a loving, familial bond among members of the Deaf community that is to be treasured, such that they often do not see themselves as lacking something we hearing people have, but having something we lack].
MEANWHILE . . .
There's a pretty amazing guy lying in a hospital bed right now, recovering from yet ANOTHER surgery, this time to remove an abscess from his brain.
Ed Wasrud, old chum from our beloved assembly in Wisconsin, Wauwatosa Bible Chapel, has a nasty infection that spread to his brain. It started with a mysterious pain behind his eye.
He has since had that eye removed, and then some.
A boatload of pain, stress and heartache has followed.
But you'll never hear ol' Ed whine, moan or complain. He meets it all with faith and his own brand of (sometimes warped) humor.
Unlike me, I fear.
I multitask. I can whine, moan AND complain all at the same time, while driving, eating, or even taking a shower!
Earlier today, I re-posted one of my very favorite songs, "He Will Hold Me Fast," sung by Kristyn Getty.
I'd like to dedicate that song to my brother and fellow sufferer, Ed Wasrud.
Hang in there, my brother.
'Coz HE is certainly hanging on TO YOU. Absolutely guaranteed.
He WILL "hold you fast."
(Hebrews 4:15a; 10:23; Deuteronomy 33:27)